Ride In 8/7: Rarefied Hares

Lassitude. Lassie lacks it, always finding the energy to notify someone of a boy's being unwell in a well, but I don't, though I suppose were I to pass a well-bound boy, I'd muster the energy to call the fire department or perhaps Lassie, if I only had a whistle and not a cell phone. It's perfectly possible to commute by bicycle while still, overall, languorous- I do it nearly everyday. 

First half of the ride was brought to you by my singing some Cole Porter and if I were to convince you that my doing this was some kind of rarity, I would be duping you. The song even almost makes sense in the context of bike commuting, if my bike were the "you" that does do that voodoo that it does so well and the voodoo, rather than the mystical syncretic Haitian relation, was just an overall feeling of wellness (wellness being something other than the feeling of being trapped in a well). 

Oh, so it's going to be one of the posts, eh? Very well then. 

East Capitol is capacious, as is Pennsylvania Avenue and I appreciate that some space has been designated on the roadway as exclusively for bikes and I wish it were actually the case that people, mostly those not on bikes, thought of it that way. If it wouldn't hurt so much, I'd love to pull a prat fall in front of the next runner who feels compelled to run contra-traffic (Oliver North?) in the bike lane. My bruises would teach him a valuable lesson: that I am willing to cut of my nose to my spite my face and makes a mockery of myself to assert my moral high ground. Anything goes. 

The streets are really beaten up and it looks unnatural. Or rather, it looks natural for Mars. It's obscene. 

Other bicyclists started passing me in earnest on R Street. This was mostly related to my going slow, but it was also related to their arriving at green lights at speed, well-time, whereas I slowly pushed off. I was passed on the right a few times, which is poor form, but these things happen, I guess. I was initially bothered, but bike commutes are too fun and too short to let them be ruined by other people. Save people ruining your day for work, thank you very much. And I'll save people from wells if need be. And if anyone co-opts Lassie as a mascot for their mayoral campaign in 2014 (Saving DC from [Tommy] Wells), I'd like credit. And Classic Media would probably want royalties. Great, now I'm going to have to think about what classic tv shows best represent each member of the DC Council. (If this hasn't been done in Loose Lips, have at) 

As I was riding up Massachusetts, I looked over and saw a driver reading a book that he had perched on his steering wheel. This was while he was driving. Are you kidding me? A book? Are you fucking serious? Doesn't he know people read from iPads now? 

1 comment:

  1. Actually, that driver was probably being smart by reading a book - it's probably technically illegal under some texting-while-driving law to read from an iPad, while reading from a book, popularized long ago before we had stupid overly-specific anti-technology laws, was probably deemed too obviously stupid to need a law preventing it. I hope that made sense.