Ride In 6/19: Even the Pharaohs were Pyramidal Class

Is it especially difficult to drive an especially small car? One would think that having a relatively wider amount of road in which to maneuver, the drivers of these very small cars (SMART cars, Mini Coopers) would be able to give three feet to each and every bicycle and this continues not to be my experience. Perhaps it's just too tempting to think "hey Vern, I bet this Smart Car can fit in the bike lane." Yes, that was an Ernest reference.

There's absolutely no correlation between the way a bicyclist dresses and how he acts vis-a-vis "traffic laws."  Clothes may make the man, but they don't make the man any more law-abiding. Beau Brummel, as we all know, was a serial arsonist and I'm pretty sure Coco Chanel once said "Take off the last thing you put on and put the money in the bag and don't reach for the silent alarm or I'll blow your head off." I think it's wonderful that normal people rides bikes in normal clothes, but the idea that this would have any impact in whether the run red lights or turn without stopping is pretty fantastical.

East Capitol street and I started singing "O Holy Night." Looks like someone needed a little Christmas, right this very minute.

School children do not know how to share a sidewalk. I'm sure I could get all "streetsbloggy" and denounce this as some sort of horrible byproduct of suburbinazation and car culture, but I'm pretty sure it's just that fourteen year old kids are just self-involved and largely unaware of anything around them.

I've taught myself over the period of the past few months to ride my bike without holding on to the handlebars. I would like to thank my inner ears from providing me with the sense of balance and the Flobots for the idea. I've yet to incorporate juggling into the bike commute, but when I do, I'll be sure to tell you all about it from the hospital.

Up 11th and I caught a few red lights and it took a little longer than it would have had I not caught them, but sometimes this happens and there's nothing to cry about. Variability is good, even when it's bad. And it ultimately makes no real difference if I get stuck at one red light or the one the next block up. Civilization has red lights. I'm fine with that.

The weather wasn't exactly bad this morning, and while humid, it wasn't especially hot. It was suspiciously good weather for the so few bike commuters I saw out there. One of them was a woman I've seen before and she had a messenger bag with a button on it, but it's not a Sharrows button and DOES SHE EVEN KNOW THERE'S ONLY ONE DAY LEFT TO BUY ONE FROM MANFREDMACX.COM? She didn't seem to want to talk to me when I yelled that at her. Weird. (Fun fact: I didn't actually do that). After Wednesday, I'll do the tabulation of how much this round of button sales went and I'll talk to my novelty banker, from whom I withdraw my novelty, comically large checks and then maybe make the presentation to WABA some time thereafter. I will also continue to work with K. concerning the "Me Singing Karaoke in a Tuxedo" even that she has generously sponsored. All I'm saying is that if she doesn't pick some songs from the Smokey Robinson oeuvre, she's missing out. Maybe. I really don't know.

I wish I had a better way to ride west across town that wasn't R Street. I guess I could ride into Columbia Heights. Maybe I'll try that for a week.

I passed a guy riding up Mass who wobbled, hobbled by the weight of some tennis rackets he was carrying on his back and a large, weathered leather Gladstone bag in his front basket. I don't know he ever made it up the hill.

There's a guy I sometimes see who I really want, in my imagination, to work at the Iraq Embassy because he looks like what I would want an Iraqi diplomat to look like because he's an older, Arab man with white hair and a white mustache and he wears a brown suit and in my imagination, these are all of the qualifications that would make someone excellently qualified as an Iraqi diplomat. I mean, here's the ambassador, so I'm pretty much correct about my suppositions about what an Iraqi diplomat looks like. And no, it's not the same guy. I'm pretty sure.

I'd like my bike commute to be one mile shorter. Maybe I'll suggest that they move the university.


  1. You might have to extend button sales a day or two, as checkout at the site is again broken and I'm still in Hawaii and unable to fix it. I think there's a button sale that didn't get recorded, though the credit card was charged. Whoever that was, I will fix it when I get home tomorrow.

  2. V street makes for a change of scenery heading west.

  3. @jj- I think I'll try that tomorrow.

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  5. Great post! Are Smart Cars as well as the occasional runner (Where's your bike?) going to try to hijack the bike lane? Now I'm going to be perpetually suspicious of them. Also, I love this whole paragraph "There's absolutely no correlation between the way a bicyclist dresses and how he acts vis-a-vis 'traffic laws.'" For some reason, I expect there to be, but you are right. There's no connection. And I'm glad you find red lights nothing to cry about. Sometimes I do, but it could just be because stopping makes me sweat and then my sunblock drips into my eyeballs.