Ride Home 3/16

Before I left work I got the following email from my wife:

you took trail because you ran out of things to count? what about my vanity plate survey?

I had forgotten. She suggested that I look for correlation between vanity plates and car types. This sounded like an interesting experiment and I promised her that I would do it. Then I promptly forgot. So I had a mission for the ride home- look for vanity plates, remember them and remember what kind of car they were on. This was very hard to do. When I got home, I rushed in and said "Can I use the computer? I need to write down the license plates right now!" She thought that I saw or was in some sort of crash and was confused when I dislodged her just to write down the following nonsense. She just wanted to know if there was correlation between car type and whether or not they had a vanity plate- not the plates they actually had. Whoops.  
Anyway, here's what I saw, roughly in the order that I saw them.

  • DB 7841- Ok, I'm not totally sure that this was a vanity plate. It might be one for a soon-to-be septuagenarian douchebag. But, maybe just a coincidence. Black BMW. 
  • 1024- This was on the Virginia plate for horse enthusiasts. I assume it's a reference to the equine military tactics of the Salian dynasty. I think it was on maybe a Toyota Corolla. 
  • GRAFIX- On an SUV outside of Duke Ellington. Um, I guess graphics are more about images than spelling. 
I didn't see any more vanity plates until DC. On 34th Street, there's a house with a Georgia Bulldogs banner and there was a VW Bug with an Alabama Crimson Tide license plate holder. The license plate holder must is the apotheosis of love of alma mater. I wonder if they ever rumble. Also, a Mercedes with a Princeton license plate holder. Maybe the guy from this morning? Also, a huge black SUV (not a fully-loaded Lincoln Navigator) blocked what will soon (?) be the painted bike lane. It had two window decals- the palmetto and a Yankees logo. This is probably the most loathsome person in the world. 

I crossed the Key Bridge, which was full of Bucknell fans. Make of this what you will, but they all looked like Bucknell fans. Lots of sweatshirts. I apologize in advance of your angry letters. 

  • MS Z- On a sedan of some sort (I'd say most vanity plates were on small to midsize sedans). This seemed pretty self-explanatory- the driver has a Masters of Science in Zoology.
  • IRIGHTI- This one confused me. I read it as I RIGHT (Roman Number One), but that doesn't make any sense. Maybe it's "right between the eyes," like one of those puzzles you do in fifth grade?
  • ARKYTEK- I wonder if he knows GRAFIX? They can design a library together. Maybe go inside afterwards (after words). 
  • WAZAABI- On a grey SUV pulling out of the Ray's Hell Burger shopping center. Some sort of Boston brahmin sushi chef, perhaps? 
  • SONCBM- "My father was an Intercontinental Ballistic Missile." I think a BMW. He had this kind of plate.  
  • LHORNS- Lena Horne is alive and well and misspelling her name and avoiding apostrophes and driving a Honda Civic. 
In conclusion, Virginia has 7 letters and I think it's pretty cheap to get vanity plates here, so that serves as incentive for better self-expression. DC just has 6 letters, so there's not as many interesting things to say.

Only other item of note is that I was almost driven into, but not really. I was in the left turn lane on Wilson to turn onto Quincy. Driver next to me (in the go-straight lane [technical term]) decided that she would also turn left. During the turn she was on my right. I was riding in the middle of the travel lane and she was in the bike lane. Shoe's on the other foot, huh? She decided that she would pull even with me, rather than drop behind me. I looked at her and went with the dispassionate and factual "That's not a turn lane." Nothing in response. She pulled in front of me and was gone. At first I was mad, but mostly because my voice is not that of James Earl Jones or Christopher Lee. It's kinda nasally and dorky and I think in my upsetment, it was even slightly higher than usual. I'm proud of myself for not swearing, but that's not from any virtue- just that what I said was the only thing I could think of saying at the time. I didn't feel in real danger- I guess that's what kept the anger at bay. I mean, whatever. No one got hurt, so I'm pretty content not to dwell. 
When I pulled into our building, two people were "playing" frisbee on the grass. They weren't very good. Spring training, I guess. 

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