Volunteer Weekend is like Vampire Weekend but with volunteers in place of vampires and it's also not a band

If I've learned anything from Duck Dynasty, a show I've never watched (I'm not a big Joan Collins fan), it's that you can make a call for pretty much anything. They make calls for ducks (to shoot them, I guess?), but sometimes you can make calls for volunteers (not to shoot them) and so in that spirit, I shall call to your attention the flyer (wasn't shooting flyers the point of Duck Hunt?) posted below:

The good people at MORE (that's what they call it when you just smoosh together the chocolate and marshmallow and skip the graham cracker entirely) kindly request your voluntarily assistance this weekend! You could even say that they need you, but you don't have to say that since WE NEED YOU is featured pretty prominently on that flyer. You have three chances to volunteer this weekend and you would have three  wishes from a genie if you found a magical lamp (Wait, Larry Hagman was on that other 80s prime time soap, wasn't he? Nevermind.) If you like libations (!), event t-shirts (!!!) and Club Enduro Hours (not totally sure what those are, but they sure sound cool), now's your chance to earn them!

Let me tell you a little story about the volunteers at Tour de Fat. Last year I went to this event and some volunteers were there and they really helped me. Voluntarily. I believe they operated the bike valet and that was a really great service! The service was epic, even. But, much like they say on PBS, none of this could happen without people like you to support them! Or be them. Will MORE give you a tote bag? I don't know. Maybe one full of libations. Will MORE continue to air Ken Burns' documentaries? That's a bit out of their scope, but maybe they would if Ken Burns made one about local off-road bike trails. Anyway, help these guys out so they can keep helping us out.

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