Ride In 3/28: Blackberry ringing in the dead of night

In some ways, blogging your bike commute is like eating an empanada. In other ways, it's completely different.
It was brisk this morning, but ultimately a pleasant ride. It could have been less windy, but unfortunately, the Mayor has yet to install the much needed wind cameras and start issuing tickets to the Anemoi. Some people say that this is just a cash grab, but I'm pretty certain that less windy streets would be safer for everyone, especially if they have structurally unsound umbrellas or if they're wearing billowy pirate pants. How many times must our pirates and M.C. Hammer impersonators have to struggle through the wind before someone does something about it?
Today, I created my own wind (no, like that. that's gross) through my half-hearted attempts at whistling some Dusty Springfield. Much of my bike commutes are spent with pursed lips, which when you write it down, sounds a lot weirder than it is, unless, it's really weird to whistle in public, which it might be. Anyway, you see some weird guy on a bike whose face mirrors that of a guppy, it might be me. Some people breathe heavily when they bicycle, as they exert the effort needed to get into the RED ZONE or whatever and since my goal is never to do that on a commute, I find whistling to be a rather effective inhibitor. Cheaper than speed cameras.
On East Capitol, by the Supreme Court, there was a traffic cone in the middle of the bike lane. The traffic cone had another, smaller cone perched atop it. I don't know what that means.
Saw one of my favorite bike commuters today, the woman on the blue Canondale. I don't know why I like her so much. Maybe just because she's a regular. I rode behind her for much of Penn, but I don't know how exactly we split along 15th. Maybe it had something to do with my turning onto the street and her making it to the cycletrack. Oh well. I've never quite been able to figure out how to talk to other fellow bike commuters without being awkward about it, but that problem isn't reserved to only bike commuters. Plus, what's there to say? "Notice you ride your bike to work at roughly the same time I do the same thing. Are we friends now?" Like I said, awkward.
I forgot to mention this yesterday, but I saw a driver pull an awesome u-turn at a red light, through a crosswalk and from the far right lane, across three lanes of stopped traffic. It was impressive. Silver BMW. I drive a good bit (on weekends mostly) and I rarely feel compelled to make u-turns, but I see drivers do it a lot. I've always thought that the risk far outweighed the reward, but maybe that's not the case. I don't really know.
[Fourth wall alert: YOU DON'T HAVE TO SAY YOU LOVE ME/JUST BE CLOSE AT HAND.]
This happened:

That's the no-left turn sign at 4th and Pennsylvania that some local do-gooders had previously noticed has been installed incorrectly and subsequently did good in correcting it when it fell down. Well, it's now been adjusted further by the proper authorities, maybe, and it rests on the lower pole rather than below the "Obey this signal" sign. Did it stop the guy from making a left turn? Naw, but it's only a sign, so it can't really do more than advise anyway.
15th was crowded. All sorts of bicyclists out. Almost seemed like too many, given the relative cold. I need to readjust my expectations. Bike commuting is here in a big way. And so is my hypocrisy. I passed the guy in front of me at 15th and P as he was slowing to stop at a turning-red light. And I passed him on the right. I've become everything I hate. But here's my lame excuse: I was following the bike lane, where it sort of bulges out and he was stopping in the middle of the lane. And here's my other lame excuse: he didn't signal his turn. But I recognize that these are both lame excuses and you may throw lettuce at me the next time you see me. I don't know what would make for appropriate contrition. Maybe volunteering at the bike valet for Lumen8 Anacostia. In fact, depending on your creed and belief system and there guilt associated therewith, maybe you can receive absolution for your bike scofflawism by doing good deeds for WABA. Sign up here.
There's been construction around Sheriden Circle forever (or maybe for the past month) and today it resulted in a road closure and my having to ride on the sidewalk past a bunch of embassies and their driveways. That stinks. Driveways cutting across sidewalks aren't fun for anyone. Then it was off the sidewalk for a bit and then back on the sidewalk until Wisconsin and then off the sidewalk again. I wish I had the temerity to take the lane, but I just don't, at least not when I'm riding considerably below the speed of car traffic, which is considerably above the posted speed limit.

Ride Home 3/27: Like a limestone cowboy

So, I was stopped at a light behind a red pickup truck. He had a novelty license plate in the rear window of the cab that had written on it "Beach Boy's SURFS UP" and his real license plate holder read "I'd rather be fishin' with Opie and Andy," an allusion to Leave it to Beaver, which I believe was a television show in olden times, like the 80s when Nick at Nite aired it. Anyway, this guy loves stuff from a half century ago and he loves water-based activities, I thought, and I wondered what I would talk to him about, like if he ever had to talk. I never quite did come up with an answer.
I wanted to stage a "race" of  a sort to see if I would make it down from the top of a hill to the bottom of a hill at the same down as a driver, but it didn't quite fruit (fru-it) for reasons that I don't wholly remember. Maybe I just didn't make it down to the bottom first and subsequently decided that I would be a sore loser about the whole thing. I don't think that's it, since I'm normally not like that, but who knows? Memory, as we've all learned from reading the postmoderns, is a foreign country, or something, and that's why we need a past-port to visit there. I might have even beaten the car down the hill but that doesn't really prove anything either. Sometimes cars go faster than bikes, other times bikes go faster than cars and other times cars and bikes go faster than ocelots and other times ocelots steal your bike, throw it in the back of their car and leave you stranded on the side of the road. I wouldn't be surprised if I beat the car downhill, or at least arrived there at the same time, since stop lights do a fairly good job regulating the flow of traffic.
I've ridden my bike while dressed in all kinds of attire (regular people clothes, bike clothes, specialized pogo-specific "tech" wear) and I believe that with a certain degree of certitude I can conclude that some drivers give you room and some drivers don't and it has nothing to do with me. Bicyclists, as a class (they fall somewhere between the proletariat and bourgeoisie, I think), tend to give themselves a little bit too much credit/blame for the things that happen around them. Today I rode in a green sweater (which people at work found remarkable for some reason and remarked upon it, as if one is only permitted to wear green on St. Patrick's Day) and an untucked white shirt and some unremarkable black pants and I'm fairly certain that I looked like a normal people and I'm fairly certain that nothing different would have happened to me or around me had I been dressed a different way.
After Sheriden Circle, there was a line of cars and buses stopped at the red light at 23rd (UPDATE: I mean 22nd. See comment below). I started to filter past the buses on the right side, but then the light turned green and one of the buses started pulling forward. I stopped, picked my bike up and lifted it onto the sidewalk. Don't pass on the right if you're not going to get to the front of the queue before the light changes. At least, I don't.
Traffic (car traffic) seemed rather terrible from Dupont Circle to about 13th street and that slowed me down considerably, in no small part due to the number of drivers who couldn't quite keep their cars out of the bike lane. I tweeted something facetious about this, but upon further reflection, I think that any kind of bike infrastructure that is so meek and ineffectual as to allow drivers to transgress against it is the kind of bike infrastructure that forces drivers to drive in it. Basically, that's a case for separated bike facilities (maybe on the other side of the parked cars), like they have in real counties. Then drivers wouldn't actually be able to drive in it and I think that everyone, cyclists and snarky cyclists alike, would be much better off for it.
I saw a car from Georgia transporting a Jazzy Power Chair on 11th, the Jazzy placed on some rear-mounted Jazzy holder. There appear to be many models of Jazzy, but I don't know if this was a road one or a mountain one.
Can everyone, bicyclists and drivers and pogoists alike, please learn to stop at red lights before turning right? Like, please? I worry about drivers right hooking me and I worry about bicyclists cutting me off and I wouldn't appreciate either of those activities. I also got frontended (is this a term?) by the taxi driver turning right from New York Avenue and almost ran into the back of a bicyclist doing the same thing. In either case, their stopping would've been cool.
There was a large sign outside the Capitol that was something about foreskin. I kid you not. I think it said "my foreskin is not a birth defect." Ladies and gentleman, Washington, DC.
I rode up the Capitol for a little while behind a woman on a CaBi, but she turned rather mysteriously to, I think, accommodate my passing her. Totally unnecessary. My advice to other bicyclists is never do anything to accommodate the cyclist behind you. Maybe that's wrong, but that's how I feel. If people wants to ride faster than you, let them. But also make them.
Supreme Court was still there. In case you were wondering.
I really enjoy the last mile of my bike commute. Sometimes I wish it was the only mile. A one mile bike commute would be pretty nifty. The blog might suffer ("Ride In 4/3: Rode East Capitol. It was fine.") but, overall, it'd be great. Anyone out there commute a mile by bike? Is it awesome?

Guest Post: Froggie is Bike Commuting While He Still Can (Though He Might Do It More When He Moves, or at least hopes to)

Here's a special bonus guest post from longtime friend of the blog, Froggie, that he has kindly allowed me to crosspost here.Whereas I'm pretty much a sot and a wastrel, Froggie has been working at the Pentagon doing important things, sometimes overnight during the overnight shift. Here's a synopsis, an a quantitatively exacting one at that, of his past couple of weeks (which unfortunately will be his last couple of weeks in DC) of bike commuting. 10 billion thank yous in his general direction. 

It's been a busy month. Between college classes, my temporary duty at the Pentagon, and my impending transfer to Norfolk, I haven't had much time for blogging.

But one thing I have been able to do is bike commute, especially over the last two weeks. 7 out of 10 commutes during those two weeks were bike commutes. I was also able to get a few bike commutes in during the previous weeks. And my schedule enabled me to make a few Friday Coffee Club gatherings with the BikeDC crowd.

This week, however, is my last week at the Pentagon. Which means it's my last week for easy bike commuting.

There have definitely been some advantages to the bike commute. First and foremost, it's exercise (all important to the active duty military member). Second, the cost is practically zero...always a plus with gas prices near $4/gallon and a peak-of-the-peak Metrorail fare of $3.05. Commuting time is comparable to the 9A bus (without having to deal with a 30-minute headway) or the off-peak Metrorail commute (my apartment's Metro shuutle doesn't run off-peak). And I was also able to park the bike closer to the office than both the Metro station and car parking.

Between roadtrips and the Suitland commute, I normally average about 2,000 miles a month on my car. Over this past month, though, I've barely put 300 miles on. While the lack of roadtrips accounts for some of that, at least 500 miles of the difference can be attributed to not using the car for commuting.

One thing I've noticed with my bike commuting is an increase in appetite. Unfortunately, instead of holding my food intake steady, I started eating more. So I haven't really lost any weight.

The overall experience is such that, when I transfer to Norfolk in 2 months, I'm going to look for a place to live that gives me the opportunity to bike into the Navy base. Until then, I have 2 more bike commutes to look forward to this week.

Ride In 3/26: No Mad Men Spoilers Here

Not even a glancing Mad Men reference. I promise. And why should there be? This is a bike commuter blog, putatively about bike commuting, not my tv recap blog Tales From My Couch, in which I daily document all of the television I watch and "irreverently observe" commercials or whatever. That blog is yet to launch because with all the bike commuting and the bike commuting blogging and the tv watching, I don't think I could make time for the tv watching blogging, unless I quit my job, but then I'd have too much free time since I wouldn't bike commute anywhere and then wouldn't have the opportunity blog my bike commute.
Roads seemed empty today. Is it spring break? Have people vacated the city for reasons that might or might not be related to imminent Balrog attack or maybe a high pollen count? There were even extra bikes in the Bikeshare stations I passed, meaning that everyone didn't give up their cars for bicycles, or at least not CaBis. There was also a downtick (is that a thing?) of bicyclists on their own, non-Bikeshare bikes along my normal route, so I guess that's not it either. Maybe everyone just took public transportation today, perhaps to stand in line outside of the Supreme Court. Nothing prepares oneself for standing in line like standing in line waiting for a bus.

Characteristically terrible picture. 

As we all know, today the Supreme Court is doing something related to courting, perhaps supremely. It also involves OBAMACARE, which I believe is an acronym, like SCUBA or SPECTRE. I don't know what each constitutuent letter stands for, but according to some AOL email forward I got, collectively, they all stand for SOCIALIZM, with a Z. The Z is extra terrifying for reasons that are obvious. Honestly, I thought that traffic would be much worse around there and maybe even media vans parking in the bike lanes, but it really wasn't bad at all, thus denying me a chance to get all huffy at some cable news hacks. Oh well. Next time.
I try to be conscientious and not ride too close to the bicyclist in front of me. No story there, just sharing. Sometimes it's hard to know how close is too close, but not really. If you can touch the person in front of you, you are too close. If your front wheel is next to his or her real wheel, it's too close. If he turns around and says "STOP SMOTHERING ME!" you're too close and he might have some mommy issues. The new book by Bike Snob has a section dedicated to annoying cyclist-to-cyclist behavior and this is one of things he mentions. The technical slang term is "wheelsucking." So, don't do that.
I did wind up riding behind a guy who maybe wasn't going as fast as I would've liked to ride but also was going too fast for it not to be awkward for me to ride around him because in so doing, I wouldn't have really created enough "separation" so I'd then just be riding in front of him by about 10 feet, which seems sort of passive-aggressive. "Yeah, I'm going to make this effort to pass you, but then I'm just going to ride 10 feet in front of you," would be a thing that someone who did that kind of thing would say, if they were forced to say anything about it, which presumably they wouldn't be.
I rode up 11th and passed a guy walking around his white van. When I rode past him, he made the requisite "whoa" noise, the noise made by someone who isn't looking and would never expect that a bicyclist might also be on the street. He sounded a big indignant as well. If I were passed at the same speed and with the same distance between us by a driver, I wouldn't be so much indignant as forever grateful for their care and concern. But it's a perceptive thing I guess.
11th is a light climb. I never remember that. Lots of cyclists coming in the other direction, both on the bike lane parts and the non-bike lane parts.
Rode behind a guy on R who's bike sounded like squeaky bed springs. I don't think that's a good sign. And then I rode behind some other people, none of whom were wearing clown makeup, which is great because that'd be petrifying. No CaBis on R, though I did see a rebalancing van. I also didn't notice any special enforcement efforts. The scourge of cycling scofflawism will apparently remain in our midst. You can feel about that however you wish.
Yellow bike, leopard print yellow and black bartape on his fixie, all-black converse and green canvas backpack that looked like it came from a military surplus store and he was in front of me for the entire climb up Massachusetts from the Islamic Cultural Center to Wisconsin Avenue. His pace was plodding and deliberate, not slow but could've been improved with the addition of other gears. In sympathy, I rode behind and I didn't change gears and we mashed together and I don't think we even stopped until Garfield. I can't say I terribly enjoyed it.
I screwed up around Ward Circle and wound up riding around the circle instead of across it. Stupid circles (yeah, I'm going to blame the street layout and not my own poor decision making. That's cool, right?)

Posting Delays Delay Posting

I think I'm going to combine last night's ride home, today's (brief) ride in and tonight's ride home into one "epic" post that I'll either write tonight, write tomorrow during the Chelsea game, write tomorrow after the game or write on Sunday, perhaps while drinking a mojito. So, for those of you in habit of using these posts to fritter away the lunch or post-lunch hour, I suggest you fritter the time away another away, perhaps with fritters themselves, as fritters are delicious. You may heckle my lack of posting in the comments. Or you may praise my lack of posting, in the hope that so doing will convince me to finally stop blogging about my bike commute and dedicate myself more fully to my "true" talent, namely dressing toy poodles in vintage clothes and staging them to recreate my favorite scenes from Mad Men.