It was one of those boo-frickin-hoo nights where I was in a crummy, glum mood and all "woe is me" about all things and this didn't help contribute to my overall excitement about bike commuting. Oh, poor baby, has to ride his bike home in beautiful sunny weather through an amazing city and pass world famous landmarks that millions of people pay money to travel to each year. But whatever. I don't like being in moods like this for my rides because it's really not a fun mood to be in ever and my bike commute is something that I'd rather not have spoilt through my own piteousness. Plus, it's always better to ride with a clear head, helmeted or otherwise.
Don't think much happened until some stuff did, but it was the kind of unremarkable stuff like drivers getting themselves in the wrong lane and then pissing off other drivers trying to get back into the right (lefter) lane. This happens every day at the entrance to the Rock Creek "Why is there a highway in this park?" Parkway. It's not like there's a big red arrow and a bunch of signs that suggest one shouldn't get in that lane. I mean, other than that one big red arrow and that bunch of signs. I only complain about it, insofar as it affects me, which is sometimes a little. I guess it mostly concerns me insofar (double insofar points!) as I'm the most vulnerable road user (I mean aside from Samuel L. Jackson fron Unbreakable) and once things start breaking down and starts getting unpredictable and deviates from the usual, things get appreciably worse for bicyclists. I just like it when everyone does what everyone always does because that means I can do what I normally do, instead of, like tonight, ditching to the sidewalk for a while and then jumping back onto the road a couple of blocks farther down.
I think that bus riders are the least looked after members of the entire urban transportation ecosphere. Poor bus riders. You should start a union or something. Or some kind of fraternal order. Maybe if you wear hats that look like moose antlers, you'll get some respect.
Enterprise rental truck ---> right hook potential. I didn't like it at the time and I don't much care for thinking about it now. Some bike rides seem to lend themselves to quiet contemplation and others seem to lend themselves to mostly audible cursing.
Rode behind the same woman on Q today as I did yesterday. She's my commute buddy, I guess. She has a tote bag that she throws alternately over her right and left shoulders. I'm not totally sure there's anything in this bag, as it flaps about quite a lot.
[The Harlem Globetrotters are featured on tonight's Dance Moms. What is this, Scooby Doo? (hope you speak Swedish!)]
11th street, from Mass to Penn, needs bike lanes. It's sort of inexcusable that it doesn't. But here's the problem: any bike lanes on 11th are just going to be blocked by turning cars, buses pulling in and out of stops, and cars leaving parking garages. So, unless there's a dramatic change to the way the rest of 11th street works, bike lanes aren't going to be a panacea. Also, does anyone else wish the Hotel Harrington's kitcheria still existed? I see the sign every day and think, " you know, I've always wanted to get food poisoning at a kitcheteria."
Somehow Penn seemed less onerous today than yesterday. Maybe I'm maturing (pronounced with a hard t). Though the Penn bike lanes were occupied today by a Chinese tv news crew. Breaking at 11: my slow ass biking home.
Occasionally, traffic gets backed up on Independence Avenue and it diverts to the local streets and drivers like to drive on these calm residential streets like they're on some kind of thruway. I don't appreciate this and when I feel especially cheeky, I decide to be that bicyclist who not only comes to a complete stop at each stop sign, but also dramatically puts a foot down and makes a big show of looking both ways, at least twice, before crossing. Because I'm something of a jerk. Something that isn't jerky in any way is Friday Coffee Club and since it's Friday tomorrow, this is a reminder that all are welcome. Swing's is at 17th and G and there are bikey types around from 7:30 to 9. You'll know the place because there'll be all those bikes out front. And people inside who look like they've biked there, whatever that means. Also, one of us will be wearing a pirate costume. I hope. Yarrr.
3/15/12
Ride In 3/15: Michael York, Peppermint Patty
Yesterday, on a Wednesday in March, Capital Bikeshare broke its all-time ridership record with 6313 rides, beating the previously established record of 6044 from July 4th, one of the most touristy and out-and-about days on the DC calendar. I contributed approximately zero of those trips, but the Official Wife was one and I suspect that many of you contributed others. Bravo! I wouldn't hazard a guess at to whether we'll break the record again today (although I did hazard that guess yesterday and totally nailed it), but it might be close. Breaking records is great, but I'm starting to wonder about the upper bounds of the system. For the more mathematically inclined, I'd like to set you this challenge: is there a maximum reasonable number of trips that we can anticipate before the system can't handle any more with the current number of bikes? Would some combination of empty docks and full docks and the inability to rebalance them quickly enough make it impossible for Bikeshare, following the already established basic patterns of demand and usage, to cross a certain threshold? Get at it, boffins! I'd gladly post your results and that will ensure they'll reach an audience of nine, including my mom.
It was another morning ride in morning weather that I lack the ability to describe adequately in prose. Or in verse, really. It was the kind of weather than embraces you when you're stopped and misses you when you roll through it. I wasn't kidding about the lack of ability to describe it, as that previous sentence shows. What I can describe, in words, but better with a photograph, is that pothole on East Capitol.
I think that an entry-level road bike isn't a very good choice if you're looking to purchase a bike for bike commuting. That's just sound random idea that I have apropos of nothing, except for the number of people I see commuting on them. But then again, I encourage you to commute by bicycle and if that's the bike you want or the bike you have, using that is still vastly preferable to not commuting by bicycle, unless of course, you don't want to, which is also fine.
Police: I'm just going to assume that if you're making a u-turn across the Penn Ave bike lanes, it's because there's an emergency somewhere.
For a block, a man driving his Volvo was using the bike lane as a non-bike lane and this was somewhat terrifying to me and I looked back a couple of times so as to suggest that perhaps he should no longer do this. He then tried to make an illegal left at 14th, but was shooed away by the DDOT traffic helper (I don't know what else to call this position. He's not a crossing guard. He's a guy that stands there and directs drivers not to block the intersection. Traffic helper seems about as good of a term as any).
Again, the White House was closed off and rather than try to ride my bike on the sidewalk past what was something like 11 zillion school children in matching bright green shirts, I decided that I would just up 15th and cut back over at I (Eye). Along 15th, I (ego) was passed by a superbiker in all black kit who didn't really seem to know where he was going but was going to get there fast! Mount Vernon trail's thataway, man! But then I (ego) didn't cut back over at I (Eye) and rode up Vermont and through the traffic circle and found myself on 14th street. SPOILER ALERT: 14th street was wonderful! Rather than the stop and go of the 15th street cycletrack, and the hordes of cyclists riding directly at me, I had a bike lane all to myself and a fairly straightforward, and maybe even marginally faster, ride to R. Who knew? I mean, other than all of the people who already knew, but for some reason, didn't tell me. Thanks a lot, guys.
Four-times shoaled at 16th and R. And guess what? No one was "quick off the line," nor were they especially quick thereafter. Such is life.
If you were wearing a raincoat today, as one woman riding in front of me was, I think you got the weather wrong. People who wear superfluous coats are history's greatest monsters.
I spent a lot of the last ten minutes of my ride whistling "Love is a Battlefield." Nothing says "I'm taking the lane" like Benatar. I'm very badass.
It was another morning ride in morning weather that I lack the ability to describe adequately in prose. Or in verse, really. It was the kind of weather than embraces you when you're stopped and misses you when you roll through it. I wasn't kidding about the lack of ability to describe it, as that previous sentence shows. What I can describe, in words, but better with a photograph, is that pothole on East Capitol.
I think that an entry-level road bike isn't a very good choice if you're looking to purchase a bike for bike commuting. That's just sound random idea that I have apropos of nothing, except for the number of people I see commuting on them. But then again, I encourage you to commute by bicycle and if that's the bike you want or the bike you have, using that is still vastly preferable to not commuting by bicycle, unless of course, you don't want to, which is also fine.
Police: I'm just going to assume that if you're making a u-turn across the Penn Ave bike lanes, it's because there's an emergency somewhere.
For a block, a man driving his Volvo was using the bike lane as a non-bike lane and this was somewhat terrifying to me and I looked back a couple of times so as to suggest that perhaps he should no longer do this. He then tried to make an illegal left at 14th, but was shooed away by the DDOT traffic helper (I don't know what else to call this position. He's not a crossing guard. He's a guy that stands there and directs drivers not to block the intersection. Traffic helper seems about as good of a term as any).
Again, the White House was closed off and rather than try to ride my bike on the sidewalk past what was something like 11 zillion school children in matching bright green shirts, I decided that I would just up 15th and cut back over at I (Eye). Along 15th, I (ego) was passed by a superbiker in all black kit who didn't really seem to know where he was going but was going to get there fast! Mount Vernon trail's thataway, man! But then I (ego) didn't cut back over at I (Eye) and rode up Vermont and through the traffic circle and found myself on 14th street. SPOILER ALERT: 14th street was wonderful! Rather than the stop and go of the 15th street cycletrack, and the hordes of cyclists riding directly at me, I had a bike lane all to myself and a fairly straightforward, and maybe even marginally faster, ride to R. Who knew? I mean, other than all of the people who already knew, but for some reason, didn't tell me. Thanks a lot, guys.
Four-times shoaled at 16th and R. And guess what? No one was "quick off the line," nor were they especially quick thereafter. Such is life.
If you were wearing a raincoat today, as one woman riding in front of me was, I think you got the weather wrong. People who wear superfluous coats are history's greatest monsters.
I spent a lot of the last ten minutes of my ride whistling "Love is a Battlefield." Nothing says "I'm taking the lane" like Benatar. I'm very badass.
3/14/12
Ride Home 3/14: No, seriously, I'm writing a book about Arnold Palmer's retirement
I don't have any tattoos. Obviously. Well, not obviously, if you've never seen me and my lack of tattoos, but still sort of obviously if you know of my debilitating fear of ink. I only use pencils and have never eaten squid. Anyway, as you also know, if I did have some 'body art,' which I don't, it'd be an image of poodle on a pennyfarthing and maybe a bag of corn chips. Curiously, this tattoo isn't one of the more common ones (philistines) that I see on my yearly Tattoo Review (which is totally different from the yearly T.A.T.U revue, popular in the transvestite bars of Moscow) that takes place on the first really warm day at my workplace, which happens to be a college campus. And here's what's new in tattoos this year: um, not very much. I saw some random squiggles and maybe an animal or some tribal stuff and some words, but never the words "Toy Poodle on Pennyfarthing," which would be included within the overall skene of my 'ink' because I think the image would need a caption, so as to provide some clarity, like a New Yorker cartoon. All of this, other than being a total waste of your time, is a long-winded wind-up to tell you that today was, once again, a warm one with temperatures achieving a certain number of celsius that equals about 80 in fahrenheit. There was sun. There was sweat.
About halfway down Mass, at the intersection with Macomb, another bicyclist pulled to the side of the road and stopped. As I passed, I said "is everything ok?" She didn't say anything. And then I looked back again and was like "everything ok?" from about 20 feet farther down the road and by that time she had her earbuds out and was like "yeah" and that's my story about good samaritanism. It's generally a good rule to ask bicyclists who are not engaged in the actual activity of bicycling if they're ok, because sometimes people get flat tires or have other mechanical issues. I do it, at least.
Can't remember the exact reasons I was mumbling under my breath at drivers today, but I assume they were valid. I suspect they were just the usual ones. Nothing to get too worked up over. Probably just the whole "I'm gonna block most of the lane, even though parked cars make it impossible for me to get by without leaving the lane, but I don't really want to leave the lane because after the parked cars I'll totally be able to continue in this lane and then get to my destination marginally faster than I would have had I had to spend like 2 seconds moving left and then moving back right." Either that or something else. Mutter mutter mutter mutter.
I'd like to declare that I am not an expert. At anything. Once I thought I was an expert at tic tac toe, but then I met this really smart chicken. Comeuppance! And I'm especially not an expert at bike commuting. And I'm especially loath to give advice about bike commuting (even though I kind of do it all the time) and I'm fairly certain that in no certain terms should anyone listen to any advice I have to give about bike commuting, because I'm not an expert and you should only ever listen to experts or gypsy fortune tellers. But I feel like its incumbent on me, the self-appointed scribe of #bikeDC that no one ever asked for, to perhaps offer some suggestions, that one may take or leave, with regard to the operation of a bicycle in urban commuting situations. Again, you might not want to listen to these and instead "go with your gut," just like that last guy did with that whole WMD in Iraq thing. Anyway, just some ideas:
About halfway down Mass, at the intersection with Macomb, another bicyclist pulled to the side of the road and stopped. As I passed, I said "is everything ok?" She didn't say anything. And then I looked back again and was like "everything ok?" from about 20 feet farther down the road and by that time she had her earbuds out and was like "yeah" and that's my story about good samaritanism. It's generally a good rule to ask bicyclists who are not engaged in the actual activity of bicycling if they're ok, because sometimes people get flat tires or have other mechanical issues. I do it, at least.
Can't remember the exact reasons I was mumbling under my breath at drivers today, but I assume they were valid. I suspect they were just the usual ones. Nothing to get too worked up over. Probably just the whole "I'm gonna block most of the lane, even though parked cars make it impossible for me to get by without leaving the lane, but I don't really want to leave the lane because after the parked cars I'll totally be able to continue in this lane and then get to my destination marginally faster than I would have had I had to spend like 2 seconds moving left and then moving back right." Either that or something else. Mutter mutter mutter mutter.
I'd like to declare that I am not an expert. At anything. Once I thought I was an expert at tic tac toe, but then I met this really smart chicken. Comeuppance! And I'm especially not an expert at bike commuting. And I'm especially loath to give advice about bike commuting (even though I kind of do it all the time) and I'm fairly certain that in no certain terms should anyone listen to any advice I have to give about bike commuting, because I'm not an expert and you should only ever listen to experts or gypsy fortune tellers. But I feel like its incumbent on me, the self-appointed scribe of #bikeDC that no one ever asked for, to perhaps offer some suggestions, that one may take or leave, with regard to the operation of a bicycle in urban commuting situations. Again, you might not want to listen to these and instead "go with your gut," just like that last guy did with that whole WMD in Iraq thing. Anyway, just some ideas:
- Riding past someone on your bicycle or being passed by someone on a bicycle is in no way a referendum on anyone's masculinity and you might want to inform your testosterone accordingly. Once, in my town where I grew up, we actually had a referendum on some dude's masculinity and he lost and from that point forward he was called Jennifer. But bike commuting isn't that. You don't get bonus man points for passing someone too closely and you don't lose man points if someone happens to want to ride faster than you. In fact, there are no such thing as man points, or at least that's what Jennifer said.
- A bike lane is too narrow a space in which to pass another bicyclist. You want to pass someone who's in the bike lane? Get out in the travel lane. If you can't do that, then you gotsta wait. You gotsta.
- If you pass me when I'm stopped at a stop light but your such close to me that the best picture I can't help but scoff at how close we are, then it's maybe not advisable to do so. I find that, as a rule, the people who say "I'm quick off the line" tend not to be as quick as they think they are. Pass while moving. And only on the left.
- Don't stop in crosswalks. I've heard a rumor that if you block a crosswalk with your bike, any crossing pedestrian gets any coins you happen to have on your person. Relatedly: don't bring your precious coin collection on your bike commute!
- If you run a red light and you impact anyone else's travel in any way whatsoever, you did it wrong.
- Street harassment is never cool. Nor is ogling by bike. Nor is yodeling by bike. Nor is ogling yodelers.
- Bike commuting, while an opportunity for exercise, isn't really something that you should think of as exercise and you shouldn't, at least in the context of city riding, try to max out your ergs (is that a work out term? I thought I had a gym membership, but it was just a Chipotle punch card) or whatever. You oughn't drive like you're a race car driver and you oughtn't bike commute like you're in a velodrome. That's velodromatic.
- Overuse of bullet points is a good indication that your writing otherwise lacks structure.
11th was crowded with bikes and cars and buses and one guy on a CaBi who kept pulling up alongside me at stop lights. And then maybe the guy with the kid carrier from yesterday shoaled me again today. I don't know.
All of the tourists are here. All of them. I didn't commute through downtown last spring and I think I might want to investigate other ways to get home. It's not that tourists are bad. I love tourists. I even love the movie The Tourist, even though I've never seen it. But bike commuting anywhere where there's a lot of people walking in the shared space dedicated to bikes and pedestrians isn't really enjoyable. It's not them. It's me. Maybe E Street is better than Penn. I'll try that.
I think I saw a sometimes blog commenter today. dcdouglas, was that you? Grey Bern helmet? Jamis? I was taking a picture of the big pothole (now with cones!) along East Capitol and you were riding behind a guy on a CaBi and you looked frustrated. I caught up with you along the park, but I didn't say anything because I forgot whether your name was Doug or Scott. I really didn't want to get it wrong, so I didn't say anything. On a related note, if this wasn't dcdouglas and it was a guy named Scott, what's up, Scott? Anyway, I'd just like to use this terrible story as an opportunity to thank all of you who read and comment upon this blog. I could do it without it, but it'd be ever so lonely. You're all the best.
Ride In 3/14: My book about Arnold Palmer's retirement would be called "The Road to the Final Fore"
I would very much like to have the job of writing headlines for the New York Post. If anyone out there has the ability to facilitate this, I'll buy you a smoothie or something to show my gratitude.
Some unrelated, but very sad news, that you've probably heard already: long-time 'friend of the blog' (it's a one-way friendship, really), famous Tyrolean-American actor Peter Facinelli, "star" of the Twilight films and portrayer of Jennifer Love Hewitt's dick ex-boyfriend in Can't Hardly Wait, is getting divorced from his wife, Jennie Garth. We, and by we, I mean me, but also probably them and their publicists, would like you to respect the couple's privacy during this trying time. Thank you.
With the heavy stuff out of the way, I guess I can continue on with the bike commuting stuff, much as I continue to carry on with bike commuting, which I do while carrying stuff on my bike. It was a wonderful morning for commuting by bicycle and more than the usual suspects were out and about, though the usual suspects were also out, which is also something that might have happened at a Blockbuster in 1996. No CaBis at Lincoln Park at roughly 8:15 and a stream of five or six bike commuters making their way in front me along East Capitol. I also passed Dave, who was angrily tweeting (maybe?) about the giant sinkhole in the middle of the street, something I've ridden past for the past couple of days but have neglected to mention because I'm not very good at this.
Oh, treat sidewalks and mixed use paths like 'no wake' zones when there are pedestrians about. Pretending that you're following the laws of the sea always makes things more fun. Every once in a while, I turn my sharrows button upside to signal distress. But only on May days. (I'll be here all week, folks.)
There's much to be said for indolence in bike commuting and I feel like I'm the right person to say it, since I'm about the laziest bike commuter there is. I only pedal when I know that I won't have to come to a stop and even then I'll only pedal as fast as it'll take to get me through the next light. Otherwise, I'll just let forward momentum carry me forward or maybe I'll just put my foot down because balancing seems so hard and more than a little showy.
The meshies are back. Meshies are those guys who might be named Mike who bike commute while wearing mesh shorts. Just so we're clear, there's nothing wrong with wearing mesh shorts while bike commuting. Most meshies use backpacks instead of panniers, even though their hybrid might have a rear rack, and about every other meshie wears earbuds. A good portion of meshies pride themselves on their speed and bike handling, but sometimes this pride is misplaced. I would say that's relatively true of most bicyclists. No one rides as well or as cleverly as we think we do. Anyway, the return of the meshies (the rejected title for Space Jam 2), is the true hallmark of the arrival of springtime. So, huzzah for that.
White House entrance was closed, so the state security forces made bicyclists ride on the sidewalk, which I believe is illegal. I believe that's called entrapment (laser scene). 15th was full of bicyclists, as were its cross streets. I wonder to what extent the cycle track on L will reroute bike traffic from that interior lane on K. I would expect a lot, but I'm always amazed by the number of people who ride on blocks that are only one block away from better bike infrastructure. My whole commute route is dictated, rightly or wrongly, by my desire to use bike lanes, but I might be in the minority on this one.
I used my thinking time on Massachusetss to come up with a probably illegal, but perfectly good (maybe) idea, for a carpooling app that involves the buying and selling of rides. This was mostly brought on by my observing the number of lone drivers stuck in traffic. Here's how it work. Let's say you don't want to drive to work. You put your start and finish destination (and rough arrival time) into the app and the price you'd be willing to pay for someone to drive you. Other people who are driving can see all the potential fares out there and essentially peer-to-peer contract with a passenger. The money doesn't exchange hands between the driver and passenger, but instead goes to the third-party app and can be banked (so a driver could use it when he wants to be a passenger) or cashed out, with a small percentage taken off the top. Essentially, everyone can operate a taxi. This is probably illegal, but I think it'd have the potential to increase carpooling. Drivers and passengers could negotiate all sorts of things, like whether the passenger would be willing to get dropped off 15 minutes earlier or a couple blocks away for a lower price. It's slugging, but with money. And since all the data will be open to all other users, you could actually create a pretty dynamic market and establish some real pricing guidelines. You'd have to come up with a way to "lock in" rides, so people don't cancel (either drivers or passengers), but there's probably a way to do this. Anyway, if anyone wants to make this happen and has technical aptitude, please let me know. Also, don't tell Avego because it sort of seems like they've already done it. On a related note, if you like getting into cars with strangers, download the Avego app.
Some unrelated, but very sad news, that you've probably heard already: long-time 'friend of the blog' (it's a one-way friendship, really), famous Tyrolean-American actor Peter Facinelli, "star" of the Twilight films and portrayer of Jennifer Love Hewitt's dick ex-boyfriend in Can't Hardly Wait, is getting divorced from his wife, Jennie Garth. We, and by we, I mean me, but also probably them and their publicists, would like you to respect the couple's privacy during this trying time. Thank you.
With the heavy stuff out of the way, I guess I can continue on with the bike commuting stuff, much as I continue to carry on with bike commuting, which I do while carrying stuff on my bike. It was a wonderful morning for commuting by bicycle and more than the usual suspects were out and about, though the usual suspects were also out, which is also something that might have happened at a Blockbuster in 1996. No CaBis at Lincoln Park at roughly 8:15 and a stream of five or six bike commuters making their way in front me along East Capitol. I also passed Dave, who was angrily tweeting (maybe?) about the giant sinkhole in the middle of the street, something I've ridden past for the past couple of days but have neglected to mention because I'm not very good at this.
Oh, treat sidewalks and mixed use paths like 'no wake' zones when there are pedestrians about. Pretending that you're following the laws of the sea always makes things more fun. Every once in a while, I turn my sharrows button upside to signal distress. But only on May days. (I'll be here all week, folks.)
There's much to be said for indolence in bike commuting and I feel like I'm the right person to say it, since I'm about the laziest bike commuter there is. I only pedal when I know that I won't have to come to a stop and even then I'll only pedal as fast as it'll take to get me through the next light. Otherwise, I'll just let forward momentum carry me forward or maybe I'll just put my foot down because balancing seems so hard and more than a little showy.
The meshies are back. Meshies are those guys who might be named Mike who bike commute while wearing mesh shorts. Just so we're clear, there's nothing wrong with wearing mesh shorts while bike commuting. Most meshies use backpacks instead of panniers, even though their hybrid might have a rear rack, and about every other meshie wears earbuds. A good portion of meshies pride themselves on their speed and bike handling, but sometimes this pride is misplaced. I would say that's relatively true of most bicyclists. No one rides as well or as cleverly as we think we do. Anyway, the return of the meshies (the rejected title for Space Jam 2), is the true hallmark of the arrival of springtime. So, huzzah for that.
White House entrance was closed, so the state security forces made bicyclists ride on the sidewalk, which I believe is illegal. I believe that's called entrapment (laser scene). 15th was full of bicyclists, as were its cross streets. I wonder to what extent the cycle track on L will reroute bike traffic from that interior lane on K. I would expect a lot, but I'm always amazed by the number of people who ride on blocks that are only one block away from better bike infrastructure. My whole commute route is dictated, rightly or wrongly, by my desire to use bike lanes, but I might be in the minority on this one.
I used my thinking time on Massachusetss to come up with a probably illegal, but perfectly good (maybe) idea, for a carpooling app that involves the buying and selling of rides. This was mostly brought on by my observing the number of lone drivers stuck in traffic. Here's how it work. Let's say you don't want to drive to work. You put your start and finish destination (and rough arrival time) into the app and the price you'd be willing to pay for someone to drive you. Other people who are driving can see all the potential fares out there and essentially peer-to-peer contract with a passenger. The money doesn't exchange hands between the driver and passenger, but instead goes to the third-party app and can be banked (so a driver could use it when he wants to be a passenger) or cashed out, with a small percentage taken off the top. Essentially, everyone can operate a taxi. This is probably illegal, but I think it'd have the potential to increase carpooling. Drivers and passengers could negotiate all sorts of things, like whether the passenger would be willing to get dropped off 15 minutes earlier or a couple blocks away for a lower price. It's slugging, but with money. And since all the data will be open to all other users, you could actually create a pretty dynamic market and establish some real pricing guidelines. You'd have to come up with a way to "lock in" rides, so people don't cancel (either drivers or passengers), but there's probably a way to do this. Anyway, if anyone wants to make this happen and has technical aptitude, please let me know. Also, don't tell Avego because it sort of seems like they've already done it. On a related note, if you like getting into cars with strangers, download the Avego app.
3/13/12
Ride Home 3/13: Defibrillators, mount up!
Shirt, shorts, sunglasses, sunscreen, sayonara spring and say "szia!" (hungarian for hello, but this parenthetical is totally ruining the sibilance I worked so hard to establish) to summer. Spring was fun while it lasted. Thanks for the memories. I would totally write that in spring's yearbook, had spring a yearbook, but I'm pretty sure spring never got around to ordering one on account of it only being here for a day. At least it wasn't too humid, this, today's fake summer. It was pollenic, which reminded me of spring, which was also pollenic. (The Pollenic Wars was fought between Rome and Flora in roughly the third century BC, the second of which saw Hannibal cross the Alps with an army of bees. Scipio Africanus, and his lieutenant, Nasonex, eventually defeated him.)
I was permitted to leave work on the early end of the evening rush and so I did. It was barely rush-y, even and I was mostly fine with that, except that it doesn't take too many drivers to drive wonkily to drive me crazy. There's something magical about a windshield, apparently, that makes it impossible for a driver to see that his travel lane is about to turn into a parking lane. Oh well.
There are two kinds of Cat 6 commuter racers. One is wearing bike gear and wants to establish his supremacy over all others and especially those not bikerly attired. The other is wearing regular clothes and wants to prove that he, even in his lack of bicycle clothing, is in fact the supreme bicyclist. Typology ftw.
I rolled through a bunch of red lights in Dupont Circle. I hope WUSA wasn't there. I did this because it was more convenient for me to do as much. You may judge me accordingly. I would've turned on Q but I sort of didn't make it over in time. To the best of my knowledge, my scofflaw ways didn't cause anything to explode, but with all the things catching on fire these days, it's kind of hard to tell. Otherwise, I'm pretty sure my lawbreaking didn't affect anyone else, but nonetheless, if anything bad every happened anywhere, blame bicyclists. Especially in comment form.
Massachusetts on the other side was mostly fine. I didn't realize that DC had legalized mid-block u-turns for drivers, but I guess there's no other reason that it'd happen otherwise. Anyway, mid-block u-turns, as we all know, are called Idaho U-turns and I'm glad that progressive DC has finally caught up.
I rode 15th and it was fine. At one stop light, I took out my phone to check the Everton-Liverpool score (I don't want to talk about it) and I was promptly shoaled and passed on the right by a guy on a bike that had a rear rack kid carrier. Good hustle, dude. On a totally unrelated note, once I saw a guy with a foiled burrito bungeed to his rear rack. Precious cargo.
I don't know what happened, but the tourists are here. Like, as of today. Someone forgot to pull up the drawbridges. Also, someone forgot to build the drawbridges. Also, welcome to the District of Columbia! Please spend freely at local businesses and restaurants and please remember to tack on "DC voting rights" to your diatribe at your next rage-filled Tea Party-laden congressional town hall.
Segways in the bike lane. Legal. Segway rental company named "Segs in the City." Legal, but really, really terrible. The guy in the back of the group who swerves around? What a Miranda, right? (???)
The British came, maybe to give us voting rights or all of their extra flags?
I'd settle for representation in Parliament. MPs accept money orders, right?
Jaywalkers = hilarious. Sarcastic jaywalkers that are all like "Okaaaaay" when you ring your bell so as to alert them that they're about to walk into you are even more hilarious. I think I said something like "Look at the light," but what I really wanted to say to our out-of-town high school group visitor was something along the lines of- well, it's not very nice. It's better to let these things go. Jeremiads against injustice don't make for great blogging, or at least not here.
I made it home to watch some soccer, saw the second Liverpool goal and went back out to the store. But, the Ride Home post is really only for the ride home and if I told you about my bike trip to the store, I'd really be violating both the spirit and letter of this self-imposed rule. So, no mention of the polar bear, smoke monster, and the incoherent time travel sequences that were mostly a macguffin. "Not Penny's bike!" Next time, then.
I was permitted to leave work on the early end of the evening rush and so I did. It was barely rush-y, even and I was mostly fine with that, except that it doesn't take too many drivers to drive wonkily to drive me crazy. There's something magical about a windshield, apparently, that makes it impossible for a driver to see that his travel lane is about to turn into a parking lane. Oh well.
There are two kinds of Cat 6 commuter racers. One is wearing bike gear and wants to establish his supremacy over all others and especially those not bikerly attired. The other is wearing regular clothes and wants to prove that he, even in his lack of bicycle clothing, is in fact the supreme bicyclist. Typology ftw.
I rolled through a bunch of red lights in Dupont Circle. I hope WUSA wasn't there. I did this because it was more convenient for me to do as much. You may judge me accordingly. I would've turned on Q but I sort of didn't make it over in time. To the best of my knowledge, my scofflaw ways didn't cause anything to explode, but with all the things catching on fire these days, it's kind of hard to tell. Otherwise, I'm pretty sure my lawbreaking didn't affect anyone else, but nonetheless, if anything bad every happened anywhere, blame bicyclists. Especially in comment form.
Massachusetts on the other side was mostly fine. I didn't realize that DC had legalized mid-block u-turns for drivers, but I guess there's no other reason that it'd happen otherwise. Anyway, mid-block u-turns, as we all know, are called Idaho U-turns and I'm glad that progressive DC has finally caught up.
I rode 15th and it was fine. At one stop light, I took out my phone to check the Everton-Liverpool score (I don't want to talk about it) and I was promptly shoaled and passed on the right by a guy on a bike that had a rear rack kid carrier. Good hustle, dude. On a totally unrelated note, once I saw a guy with a foiled burrito bungeed to his rear rack. Precious cargo.
I don't know what happened, but the tourists are here. Like, as of today. Someone forgot to pull up the drawbridges. Also, someone forgot to build the drawbridges. Also, welcome to the District of Columbia! Please spend freely at local businesses and restaurants and please remember to tack on "DC voting rights" to your diatribe at your next rage-filled Tea Party-laden congressional town hall.
Segways in the bike lane. Legal. Segway rental company named "Segs in the City." Legal, but really, really terrible. The guy in the back of the group who swerves around? What a Miranda, right? (???)
The British came, maybe to give us voting rights or all of their extra flags?
Jaywalkers = hilarious. Sarcastic jaywalkers that are all like "Okaaaaay" when you ring your bell so as to alert them that they're about to walk into you are even more hilarious. I think I said something like "Look at the light," but what I really wanted to say to our out-of-town high school group visitor was something along the lines of- well, it's not very nice. It's better to let these things go. Jeremiads against injustice don't make for great blogging, or at least not here.
I made it home to watch some soccer, saw the second Liverpool goal and went back out to the store. But, the Ride Home post is really only for the ride home and if I told you about my bike trip to the store, I'd really be violating both the spirit and letter of this self-imposed rule. So, no mention of the polar bear, smoke monster, and the incoherent time travel sequences that were mostly a macguffin. "Not Penny's bike!" Next time, then.
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